Communication is key
Improving communication during a divorce is one of the most helpful ways to make the whole situation just a tiny bit easier on all involved. Communication is key and makes a significant difference while you are going through a divorce.
Divorces are not the most pleasant thing to go through. They can often be hard, stressful and drain all of your energy, which leads to more conflict between parties.
One of the biggest tools you can use to assist you in the process, and make things a little smoother for everyone involved, is to iron out your communication with your soon-to-be ex-partner.
If communication is something you are struggling with, here are some top tips to help improve communication during your divorce proceedings.
Three steps to a more manageable divorce
Set clear boundaries and intentions
It can be a good idea to take some space from each other to think about what you want your future relationship to look like, and how you would like to handle the divorce.
The level of contact, or even friendship in some cases, is entirely dependent on what you both want.
Have a conversation to understand how you each want things to move forward, what your boundaries are and see where you can come up with a compromise.
This might be an easy decision, or a hard one. Some couples choose to cut all contact, while others, usually those with children, make an agreement to co-parent.
Whatever you choose, you should both keep this in mind whenever you communicate in the future and respect each other’s wishes.
Put yourself in the other’s shoes
During a divorce, it is important to put yourself in your ex-partner’s shoes and consider how they are feeling and what they are going through.
It is easy to just focus on how you feel, and what you want, but the reality is that there is more than one party involved.
Once you are able to consider the other person in your actions, it will transform your communication. Often, words or behaviour can be misinterpreted, which can lead to more conflict.
So, before making any assumptions, put yourself in their shoes and see if you can understand it better, so you can react in a better way.
At this point, it is also important to communicate if there is an issue, as opposed to making a decision based on an assumption.
Use a mediator
Family mediation is a great way to negotiate and sort the disputes between you and your ex-partner.
A mediator is impartial, listens to all sides of the story without judgement, and does not take sides with either party.
This process is civil and enables a safe, and relaxed environment for you all to discuss the steps moving forward, especially if they involve property, children and finances.
Communication can be handled in a much friendlier and an effective way when there is a mediator involved, as control stays with you, as opposed to handing it over to a judge in court.
This is exceptionally helpful where communication is more difficult between parties and coming to an agreement feels impossible.
Communication is key to any divorce, and being able to move forward with your life.
Make sure you set your intentions and boundaries first, so communication is better received, consider the feelings of your ex-partner, and use a mediator is appropriate.